EVEN before I exist you are thinking of me, supplicating to Allah for me to be a healthy and righteous child. Your du'as for me are so sincere and powerful that even before I am born Allah puts it down in my destiny for me.
You carry me for nine months with toil and struggle and this is even before you have laid your precious eyes on me or touched me with your delicate fingers. I cause you sickness and fatigue for months on end but patiently you put up with it hoping that what you carry will one day be a comfort for your heart and mind.
You rub your warm hands over your bump reciting Qur'an, trying to connect to me so I can feel peace whilst inside you. You sacrifice your favourite food and take whatever is necessary even if you dislike it so no harm comes to me. You start worrying about me and praying that I am doing well without you being able to see or hear me.
And finally after those long months of hardship I come into the world putting you through even more pain that is so painful you feel you will not survive. But all that is gone with one glance when for the first time you hear my cry and wrap your arms around me for comfort. It has only been a few minutes since I have been born, but already I have put you through so much agony.
Abdullah Ibn 'Umar saw a Yemeni man performing Tawāf (circumambulating the Ka'bah) while carrying his mother on his back. This man said to Abdullah Ibn 'Umar, "I am like a tame camel for her! I have carried her more than she carried me. Do you think I have paid her back, O Ibn 'Umar?" Abdullah Ibn 'Umar replied, "No, not even one contraction!" [Al-Adab al-Mufrad Bukhārī 1/62]
Regardless of all of this pain you fall in love with me and promise to always protect me and be there for me no matter what. Your tears of joy overcome your tears of pain that I have caused. The rights I have upon you began even before your marriage and you fulfil them one by one as you bring me up in the world.
While I am a baby you respond to my endless cries and put my needs first before your own. I give nothing back to you but you give me everything you have. You take care of me without wanting anything in return, a strong love that you have never felt before. Your days of pampering disappear and how you look and dress is no longer a priority for you as long as I am kept well; that's all that matters. You feed me, wash me, clothe me and put me to sleep without even acknowledging your own wishes and desires.
So tirelessly you wipe my nose again and again and put up with my deafening screams. When I fall just once, your heart makes a jump and you come running to me to lift me up making sure I am not hurt. I am unaware that you will not only do this whilst I am taking my baby steps, but will continue to lift me up when I am down throughout my life. You take care of me when I am sick and stay up all night rocking me to sleep, soothing my stomach pains through your gentle touch and words. I am heedless of the fact that your heart is aching and in grief all because I have a fever. You are exhausted and shattered but I still demand so much from you without even realising the effect it is having on you, but you do not complain. You will give everything you have to keep me safe and all I can give you in return is my smiles.
A man came to the Prophet and said: O Messenger of Allah! Who from amongst mankind warrants the best companionship from me? He replied: "Your mother." The man asked: Then who? So he replied: "Your mother." The man then asked: Then who? So the Prophet replied again: "Your mother." The man then asked: Then who? So he replied: "Then your father." (Sahîh Bukhârî 5971 and Sahîh Muslim 7/2)
Your heart is filled with joy with the first words I speak for you and the first steps I take towards you. Simple actions made effortlessly on my behalf, but gives you so much pleasure. You watch my every move and take note of everything I do in order to understand me. I come running to you from school showing you what I have done speaking of the same things over and over again and you listen to me so attentively without any boredom.
I am unaware that in this same fashion, many years down the line when you are old, you will need my attention but will I be listening to you patiently?
"Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him and that you be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honor. And out of kindness, lower to them the wing of humility and say, "My Lord! Bestow on them Your Mercy even as they cherished me in childhood." [Noble Quran 17:23-24]
You teach me good manners and tell me about the wonders of Allah's creation. Although I do not fully understand, I am amazed by your words and passion. I watch you pray day and night and I try to imitate your actions when I am done with my toys. You are fair with me in your judgement and teach me right from wrong.
However I am oblivious that these precious lessons you teach me will be the very foundations of my character. I cause you to laugh through my silly thoughts and words and you cause me to run to you for your hugs and kisses. A beautiful friendship we share so early on, one which no one can come between. You are my world and I am yours.
"Worship God and join not any partners with Him; and be kind to your parents..." [Noble Quran 4:36]
As time goes by, I grow up with all the pressures of society around me. You try to protect me as much as possible but I am sometimes influenced by others. You continue to guide and help me, but I now I accuse you of interfering. I think I know better than you and disregard your knowledge and experience. You show me patience and I show you anger. Your voice now becomes irritating to me and the last thing I want to do is listen to you. I find friendship in others and believe this is sufficient for me.
"And your Lord has decreed that you not worship except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], "uff," and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word." [Quran 17:23]
The teenage years are tough for both of us. Although you have taken care of me for years, I now want to wear what I want and do what I believe is right without your input. I want to do what others are doing and I do not want you to come in my way. I feel I am a big girl now and I do not need you anymore. I can cope on my own without you. I want to taste the outside world and fit in even if it's at your expense. I reject and shun you but patiently you wait for me. You scold me for doing wrong and I shout at you for telling me right. I cry because I want to be free, and you cry because of your love for me.
It is related from Talhah ibn Mu'âwiyah as-Salamî who said: I came to the Prophet and said, "O Messenger of Allah, I want to perform Jihad in the way of Allah. He asked, "Is your mother alive?" I replied, "Yes." The Prophet then said: "Cling to her feet, because paradise is there." (at-Tabarânî).
With hard work I do well at school. I arrogantly believe it's all my doing and nothing to do with you. Whilst I am glued to my books I do not see how ignorant I am of you. My meals and clothes are ready without me even needing to move, but I do not care how they got there. You are there first thing in the morning and the last thing at night just for me, but I do not take heed. How blissful life is whilst you slave away being unnoticed. Your love for me continues to grow without decreasing even after everything I have put you through. When I am hurt by others you still run to me wiping away my tears and accepting me the way I am. I am reluctant to say sorry but you still forgive me without needing to ask.
I repeat my mistakes again and again and you are always there for me to fall back on years on end. Your worry for me never stops. Your supplications for me are endless. Your patience for me is beyond imagination. Your smile was there when I came into the world. Your touch was there when I made my first fall. Your words were there during the bad times and good. Your hug was there when I got my results and you are still there for me now when I am all grown up.
As you grow old and the lines on your face become more defined, I acknowledge how much you have sacrificed for me. Those soft hands that once used to hold me have become tough and hard. Those beautiful bright eyes that once used to shine for me are now grey. As I am to leave your arms and go to another for the first time in my adulthood, I realise how much of a challenge I must have been for you. But I know you do not see it that way. My tears are your tears and my pain is your pain you will say. I want to give to you all that you have given me but there is not enough time. I now know how much I should have done for you but I was too blind to see it. I now know that through serving you is Paradise and gaining your pleasure gains Allah's pleasure.
The Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) also said in a famous narration: 'Paradise lies at the feet of your mother' [Musnad Ahmad, Sunan An-Nasâ'i, Sunan Ibn Mâjah]
There is so much I want to say to you before I enter into someone else's life, but I am speechless, filled with emotion. Once again you console me with your words of wisdom advising me on how to be a good wife and what will make me happy; sacrifice, patience, love and mercy. These are the very words you have shown me throughout my life even when I haven't deserved them. Now I will have the responsibility of giving this to someone else. But I know your care and love for me will not diminish. Even if I am halfway across the world you will be wondering what I am doing, how I am coping and am I happy. Your worrying will not stop. And even though you can no longer physically do much being so far away, your du'as will always be there for me in every step I take in my new life.
And once I enter this new chapter and leave you, only then will I truly realise your value and how much you gave to me: your everything. No one in the world can come close to your love, your care and your sacrifice. And when I carry another inside of me inshaaAllah, I can only hope and pray that I can give the same sacrifice, patience, love and mercy that you have always given me.
Before it's too late – give back to your mother what she has given to you all your life. There are many simple things you can do just to make her smile.
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "Islamic Mailing Group" group.
To post to this group, send email to islamic-mailing-group@googlegroups.com.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to islamic-mailing-group+unsubscribe@googlegroups.com.
For more options, visit this group at http://groups.google.com/group/islamic-mailing-group?hl=en.
No comments:
Post a Comment